Author Archive for arifranklin

Some like it hot, and so do I. I’m a series of non-sequiturs with freckles. An admittedly weird Dolittle-esque animal whisperer. I'm an expert at telling jokes and leaving half of the set-up in my head, so if you're laughing at one of my jokes that's a good sign you might be telepathic. I’ve been called a narcoleptic, a work-a-holic, a zombie-phile, a smooth operator, and a beef-witted mammet. The last one sounds most interesting so I’ll go with that one. Someday I will go on to Cracked and invent a restaurant staffed entirely by professional magicians. Right now I’m busy uniting the world with OurPangea and hunting down cool at Origin of Cool, which is ironic because I hate hunting.